A few minor set backs

38.5 weeks and still going strong!

I have to say, that all in all, this has been a pretty easy pregnancy. Aside from some morning sickness the first trimester (first time I had ever really had it with any of my babies!) and some unwanted aches and pains (especially at night), I can't really complain... I've just been trucking along. Each Doctor visit has pretty much been the same... check the heartbeat, everything sounds good... you look great, baby sounds great, you're on your way!

The past few weeks have been a little bit of a different story, as I have encountered a few bumps on the road to my VBAC.

My first bump in the road started a few weeks ago when I started visiting a chiropractor twice a week. I met with my doula Katie to go over some things and discovered that the baby is sitting posterior. This basically means that her head is down (yay for that!) but the back of her head is on my spine instead of facing out toward my belly. The best position for birth is anterior, head down and back out to my belly. Good news is, she seems to still have room to move around. I am constantly feeling her little bottom out to my side, which makes it seem like she is trying to move out to the anterior position. Hopefully the chiropractor visits will help her turn. I am also doing some exercises from the Spinning Babies website to help her turn around.

This isn't a huge cause of concern in my journey to a VBAC. It could just mean a much longer, harder labor, if she stays in the posterior position. Not the most ideal when trying for a natural delivery... but we will make it work! The chiropractor adjustments should also help ease the pain of labor, especially with back labor (which is normally caused by a posterior baby!)

Then I encountered the next bump in the road a couple of weeks ago I am not sure if I have shared this in my previous posts or not... but my Doctor's wife is very ill and lives in a different state as she is in a special treatment facility for her illness. There was always a possibility that he could be out of town when I go into labor, visiting his wife. I can't fault him at all for this. I can't imagine only seeing my spouse once a month for a few days! A couple of months ago, he told me that his wife was in town through February... a huge sigh of relief at the time. A couple of weeks ago, I found out that she had to go back early. Dr. C. told me that his next scheduled visit with her would be February 16th, which would put me at 10 days past due. This isn't the most ideal situation, but also not the end of the world. I would like to think that my baby would decide to show up before then, but we really just don't know! I had hoped to not have any time constraints on this pregnancy, but now that may not be the case. I am left with two decisions, if she doesn't come into the world before then: 1. induce or 2. wait until he gets back and pray I don't go into labor while he is gone. I really don't trust anyone but Dr. C. to deliver this baby! He has been doing this for 30 years and knows what he is doing. I don't want to chance that I will get a Doctor who will fight me tooth and nail to just have the repeat c-section. I am just praying that I will not be faced with having to make this decision. Dr. C. is convinced that she will come before then any way, but said we would discuss options as the time draws near. I trust him completely. I know that most Doctors will never induce a VBAC patient, but I know that Dr. C. knows what to do in this situation safely.

Finally, at my 38 week appointment this week, I learned that I am GBS positive. (Group B streptococcal) Basically, this is an infection that can be passed down to the baby when the baby moves through the birth canal. Because of this risk to pass it down, it is standard procedure to give the mother antibiotics through the IV when in labor. The risk of the baby actually getting it is very minimal (even smaller than the risk I am taking with a VBAC) but can be very serious if the baby does get it. There are several reasons why I am upset with the news. One, because I had proactively been taking probiotics to keep from getting GBS... yet I still tested positive for it. Two, I really wanted to wait and labor at home as long as possible before going to the hospital. If I take the antibiotics, I may have to go in a bit sooner than I had hoped. Three, there are also risks to the infant with taking the antibiotics... it can cause respiratory issues as well as yeast and thrush (which could hinder the nursing process.) It is possible to retest at a later date and have it come back negative, but I am running out of time! It is also possible to decline the antibiotics... I just need to decide if it is a risk worth taking or not.

Again, these are all just minor set backs... I know it is still all in the Lord's hands! I never expected this to be a cake walk, that is for sure!

Regrets (If I could do it all over again)

37 weeks!!



First of all I'd like to say that I really don't have any real regrets in life. I truly believe that everything in life happens for a reason, and even though I believe I have made many mistakes in my life, I'm not sure I really regret it. My mistakes have shaped me into the woman I am today... and for that I am thankful.

That being said, if I had the opportunity to do it all over again, start fresh... go back to when I first became a Mom, there would be a few things I would do differently. I wanted to share some of them with you all. When I first started on this journey and even considered trying for a VBA3C, my first thought was that it was crazy! I didn't think any Doctor would even consider me as an option for a VBAC, so why even think about it? As I began to dig a little bit further, and learned that it was a possibility, I was more than thrilled! When I began to pray about it and seek the Lord's wisdom in pursuing it, I sort of made a pact with God. I told Him if He gave me the opportunity to go down this path, I would make the most of this special gift. That is when I decided I would most definitely start a blog and share my experience with others. I realize this was a risk, considering I still don't even know if this VBAC would be successful. But I strongly believe that my story can and will have an impact on others, whether I end up successful or not. I especially have a heart to reach those first time Moms out there who are just starting out with their first baby. There are so many things I wish I would have known, wish I would have done differently. So that is what this post is all about!

1. I wish I had done my research. I was shocked when I first learned I was pregnant. Steve and I had only been married 6 months. I was on birth control at first, and my birth control had just run out right before Christmas. My OB at the time wouldn't just refill my prescription without me scheduling my annual exam. Since it was Christmas, and I was very busy with Church stuff going on, I decided to wait until the first of the year to schedule something. Well, I was a little bit too late! I learned late January, that we were expecting our first child! I didn't really know what to expect, and I didn't really take the time to figure things out for myself. I didn't read any books, and I certainly didn't look into the options of birthing.

To those of you newly pregnant, I highly recommend that you read as many books as possible! And please don't just read "What to expect when you are expecting!" It's an okay enough book, but you need to read all different sides of birthing possibilities. Don't just go into this birth thinking that you know how you want things to go, and expect that it will all just fall into place. Be aware, be informed. I have mentioned it before, but I highly recommend Henci Goer's "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth." It is a must read for every first time Mom. Yes, it is very pro-natural birth, but it is very informative when it comes to understanding what really goes on behind the scenes of a birth.

2. I wish I had chosen a hospital and OB more wisely. Let me just start by saying that I did ask around a lot for recommendations on an OB. But I didn't know what to really ask about. I finally settled on Dr. R. because she was recommended by a friend and the hospital was very close to my work. I figured it would be convenient with my many Doctor visits, and the hospital was supposed to be one of the best in the Dallas area. Yes, it is, but I didn't know to find out things such as: what is the hospital's c-section rate? What is my OB's c-section rate? To this day, I'm really not certain of Dr. R's c-section rate, but I would suspect it is pretty high. I learned after the fact (3 babies later) that my hospital's c-section rate was one of the highest in the DFW area (if not the highest) at around 28% as of 2009, and climbing! This is unacceptable, considering the World Health Organization states that there is no reason that any hospital should have more than a 10-15% c-section rate.

If you are a first time Mom, I promise you do not want to end up with a c-section unless it is a medical necessity! You can read more about the risks of a c-section on the following site:

http://ican-online.org/pregnancy/cesarean-fact-sheet

3. I wish I would have listened to my Mom! When I first talked to my Mom about my pregnancy, she often would remind me that she had two natural births and encouraged me to consider it! I laughed, saying, "I don't have a high pain tolerance Mom. Besides, you don't get an award for delivering naturally!" Funny, I cringe when people say that to me today. My Mom was right. I should have considered it! The thought never even crossed my mind to consider it! Why would I go through all that pain if I didn't have to? Before giving birth to my first child, we took a class at the hospital. They taught us how to diaper a baby and some of the basics... but nothing about birthing. They asked for a show of hands who was planning on having an epidural, and every single woman in that room raised her hand! Let's face it, the majority of women today choose the epidural. I'm not saying that the epidural is always bad, but I do believe we should be more informed of the possible things that can go wrong with the epidural. For me, I truly believe that having the epidural was one of my biggest down falls. Epidurals are known to slow down the labor process. I had an epidural for 12 hours while I labored... and then once it came time to push, I truly believe it stalled my labor even more. I couldn't push, because I couldn't feel anything! It doesn't happen this way for every woman, but I do believe it happens often! Just consider it... God designed our bodies for birth. Pain can be manageable without the epidural. I realize I haven't experienced it yet, and I may chicken out in the end. I hope I don't! I will have my husband and doula by my side the whole time encouraging me to keep going... I do believe it is definitely possible to have a beautiful and wonderful birth, without the help of an epidural.

4. I wish I would have never agreed to being induced with my first child! This is hands down my biggest mistake. Please, please, please... if this is your first child, ride it out. You won't be pregnant forever, I promise! Unless there is a medical necessity, just wait! A "suspected" big baby, is not a medical necessity. Most of the time, ultrasounds are wrong on weight. Even if it is right, many women birth 10 lb babies without any problems at all! I was induced 3 days before my due date for several reasons: swelling and slightly high blood pressure, PUPPS rash and a suspected large baby. Carter was only 8 lbs 6 oz, hardly big at all. I could have managed through the swelling and rash. I should never have said yes! Who knows, if I had been given the opportunity, maybe Carter would have come on his own even within the next few days! He just wasn't ready yet.

5. I wish I had done more research on VBACs after conceiving my 2nd child. I really wanted to try a VBAC with Sydney, but I really didn't give it the very best chance. My OB certainly didn't either. I should have hired a doula, taken Bradley classes, read all the books and most definitely should have switched providers! If you are considering a VBAC, please ask your OB the hard questions. Ask their success rate with VBACs. I never asked my OB this. She told me she would support me in a VBAC, but she pulled the plug on me way too quickly. If you want a real opportunity to have a VBAC, you need to have all the support you can get, which starts with having a supportive provider.

This week at my appointment with Dr. C., I mentioned to him that I have been having some real contractions. I laughed, saying it's pretty funny that this is my 4th child and this is the first time I have experienced real contractions! He said to me, "Well you were never given the opportunity before." He is so right. Please get the support you need when trying for a VBAC! You will never regret it. Otherwise, you will just be on an uphill battle the entire pregnancy and delivery!

Again, this is just a "what if" post. I believe this all happened for a reason, and I am thankful for the opportunity to experience this! I just hope that first time Moms out there can benefit from some of the mistakes I made and make more informed decisions!

Let the countdown begin!

My 5 year old son took this picture, thus the poor camera angle which makes me look like a whale! I'm really not that big, at least not as big as I have been in previous pregnancies! I am now 35 weeks and 2 days... less than 5 weeks until my estimated due date! The countdown has begun, and it is time to get serious! Over Christmas weekend, I had the lovely (insert sarcasm here) pleasure of having a stomach virus and began to have a whole lot of braxton hicks contractions. I tried to stay as hydrated as possible, but I experienced contractions for a solid 3 days. I went to see my Doctor last Wednesday, and he said that was perfectly normal. During that same visit, I shared my birth plan with him. He was pretty much on board with everything on the plan and was impressed that I kept it all on one page! I don't want to come across as too demanding, but I do feel that what I put on my plan was very important to me. If you are curious to know what I put on my birth plan, I'll put it at the bottom of this post.

Today, I went to my very first chiropractor visit! As I have mentioned in previous posts, some Chiropractors are Webster-certified, which is a special technique used for pregnant women. By going to these Chiropractor visits, I hope to ensure that my baby girl is properly positioned for birth (head down, not breech or transverse!) I am also hoping it will help with this unbelievable lower back and belly pain I have been having (especially at night while I am sleeping) and help with the actual labor process. If I am going to do this natural, I need all the help I can get! I really liked the Chiropractor I chose (after asking around for many recommendations) and am planning to go again this Saturday, and hopefully bi-weekly until I give birth. Honestly, I feel better today than I have in months! My body is not in as much pain as normal... here's hoping I have the best last month of pregnancy ever! I have always said that I absolutely love being pregnant, until I make it to the last month. The last month, I could do without. It is uncomfortable and painful during the last month.

This coming Saturday, Steve and I will also meet with our doula one last time before "birth day." She will go over some relaxing techniques with us and answer any more questions we might have. This is becoming more and more real! Within the next 4-6 weeks or so, we will have a new addition to our family! I am just trying to wrap my brain around this whole VBAC thing and not allow fear to enter into my mind. I have been gathering Scripture and quotes to think on, to remind myself, that I can do this, that God will empower me to do this!

My favorite quote is by Eleanor Roosevelt: "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

And my two favorite Bible verses: "Do not fear for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

"Shall I bring you to the point of birth and not give delivery?" says the Lord. "Or shall I who gives delivery shut the womb?" says your God. Isaiah 66:9

I know my God will be with me every step of the way. I also know that if I am not successful in this VBAC, it will be for a very good reason and not because it was more convenient for my Doctor. For that, I am thankful.

Here is my birth plan:

Westdyk Birth Plan

Mother: Caryn Westdyk

Father: Steven Westdyk

Doula: Katie Perez

I desire a natural, drug free birth as long as I am able, with as little intervention as possible

Please do not offer me pain medications or an epidural, I will ask for them if I need them

Environment:

I would like to have the following people present with me at all times during labor and delivery (and during c-section if needed): Steven Westdyk (husband) and Katie Perez (doula)

If birthing equipment is available, I would like to use: Birthing bed, birthing ball, birthing stool, squatting bar

I would like to have no restrictions on food or fluids during my labor

I prefer to have a heparin or saline lock

If possible, I would like to have a nurse who has attended a natural birth

Pain Relief:

I would like to be able to walk around and move as I wish while in labor

I have prepared for this birth with Bradley techniques

Monitoring:

I prefer external, intermittent monitoring

Second Stage Laboring:

As long as the baby and I are healthy, I prefer to have no limits on pushing

I prefer to have no episiotomy and risk tearing (unless I’m having a medical emergency)

To help prevent tearing, please apply: hot compresses, oil, perineal massage

Delivery:

I prefer to have the lights dimmed and doors closed for privacy during labor

As long as my baby is healthy, I would like my baby placed on my abdomen immediately

Please delay cord clamping until it stops pulsing, or for 5 minutes (whichever comes first)

Newborn procedures:

I would like to delay the administration of eye drops and Vitamin K up to 2 hours after birth unless medically necessary
No Hep. B Vaccine please

My baby is to be exclusively breastfed, please do not offer formula without my consent

Cesarean:
If it is medically necessary to have a cesarean, I would like to be conscious

If my baby is healthy, I would like to hold her and nurse her as soon as possible

Well into the 3rd trimester...

It looks like it's been about 2 months since I have posted, so I am way overdue for an update! I am now well into my 3rd trimester at over 31 weeks and am feeling pretty good overall so far. I just recently started to feel that "uncomfortable" stage, especially at night as it is hard to get into a comfortable position. Usually this is how I feel the entire last month of pregnancy but this is starting a little bit early. I guess that goes with the territory when you are pregnant with your 4th child!

Of course I've been getting lots of the usual comments and questions that also goes with the territory... on our trip out to VA for Thanksgiving (yes, we drove 18 hours to VA with three small children and a pregnant woman, and we survived!!) an eldery man in the parking lot made a comment... he looked in our car and asked, "You've got three children back there, eh?" then looks at me and adds, "and you're expecting another? Have you figured out how that works yet?" I wanted to say, "No sir, could you please explain it to us so we can make it stop?!" Of course I just laughed and said, "Yeah, we've figured it out!" Everyone has an opinion... of course with the Duggars in the news lately, we get the questions about whether or not we are stopping at 4 or going for a record... I don't understand why 4 children is such a big number, but hey, maybe that's just me! For the record, no, we don't know if 4 is the magic number, only God knows that. Plus, a lot depends on whether or not I am successful with this VBAC. I want to believe with all my heart that I will be, but again, that's all in God's hands. Of course I am still continuing on with my preparations as much as possible. Unfortunately, things didn't work out with our Bradley classes... long story that I won't get into, but I am still preparing with Bradley methods by reading books and getting advice from my amazing, wonderful doula! She has been invaluable to us. If anyone is considering a natural birth, please, please, please hire a doula! You will never regret it!

Everything is progressing quite well with my OB visits and everything seems to be normal. Dr. C has always commented that the baby has a nice strong heartbeat and everything looks great. Now that I am in my 3rd trimester I am seeing him every 2 weeks, and then the last month I should be going weekly through my due date (and beyond if necessary!) Just so everyone knows, my "due date" is just an estimated date, not an expiration date... I have about 8 weeks until my due date, but I am fully prepared to go 2 weeks beyond that if needed. I want to give this baby every opportunity to show herself to the world when she is good and ready!

I have been reading several books in preparation for this birth. One of the books I just finished is by Henci Goer, called "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth." I have to say this book is fabulous and a MUST read for every first time Mom who is pregnant or thinking of getting pregnant. I wish I had read this before having my first child! It actually made me a little angry as I read it and realized how UN-necessary my first c-section was! One thing I learned is that an epidural can cause a fever in the mother, especially if it has been in a long time. When I was induced with my first, they immediately gave me the epidural, and I didn't go into full labor for about 11 hours... so it was in for 11 hours and then once it came time for me to push, the epidural caused me to have a fever, which it was immediately assumed that I must have an infection if I have a fever, so straight to the OR I went. When in reality, it was probably just a side effect of the epidural and not an infection at all. I wish I had known that before!

I will post more soon, but I just wanted to give an update on how things are going. Happy to be in the homestretch!

Let's start with a dream

In my last update, I forgot to mention a dream I had recently that pretty much sums up this whole journey to VBAC experience so far. I had a dream that I was sent to the hospital for "observation." I wasn't in labor yet though. For some reason, my Doctor was not available to see me, so who did they put in his place? My old OB who did all 3 of my c-sections!! I kept saying over and over again, "But I'm not in labor, I need to go home!" She kept insisting that I stay and be monitored. She strapped me down and kept saying that I needed to have a c-section! I was sweating bullets trying to figure a way out of that hospital!! Somehow I escaped... but I woke up seriously freaking out!

I think that really does sum up what many women in my position are feeling when they start this journey of attempting a VBAC. I think we feel like there are so many obstacles to overcome, the biggest one being the medical community. I am NOT anti-hospital or Doctors... I plan to birth in a hospital with a Doctor. But I do feel that the medical community as a whole needs to wake up to the reality of what is going on around them. The c-section rate is climbing every day, and it is not out of necessity, it is out of convenience! The World Health Organization says that there should be no more than 15% c-sections if all c-sections were done out of absolute medical necessity... yet the numbers have climbed well over 30% in many hospitals, some reaching as high as 50-60%! That number is astronomical to me! Unfortunately, the hospital I delivered my first three children in had a very high c-section rate. I wish I had been armed with that information before heading into my first pregnancy. There is so much I wish I had known when I first started out! This is why I feel so strongly about sharing my experiences in hopes that it will help someone out there to make wise choices for themselves instead of Doctors making those choices for them.

So here are some of the things that I am doing to make sure I have the best possible chance of having a successful VBAC:

1. Find a supportive Doctor. I truly believe this is the most important thing you can possibly do! If this is your first time pregnant, you have to be diligent about researching Doctors, asking around for recommendations and ask tons of questions when you first meet that Doctor! Don't be afraid to ask questions! Find out what their induction and c-section rate is.. if they are hesitant to answer, run as far as you can!! If you are at all interested in having a natural birth, choose a hospital and Doctor that are known for being more "pro-natural." I think if I had to do this all over again, I would've also considered using a Midwife. I think either a Doctor or Midwife is a great choice, as long as they are not known for pushing inductions and c-sections. If you are pregnant after one or more c-sections, you MUST have a Doctor or Midwife that is pro-VBAC. Don't just take their word for it if they say "Oh yeah, I'll let you have a trial of labor and TRY for a VBAC." There is a good chance, they won't in the end. Sorry to be cynical, but this is just the plain truth. Find out from your local ICAN chapter which Doctors are pro-VBAC, and choose wisely. For me, I didn't have a choice. My Doctor is the ONLY Doctor in all of Texas and really all of most of the U.S. who will do a VBAC after 3 c-sections. He is only one of TWO Doctors in the U.S. who will do a VBAC after 4 c-sections. The other one is in the Atlanta area. We are blessed in the DFW area to have such a Doctor who believes in the woman's ability to birth naturally. So no, I didn't have a choice, but I couldn't be happier with that choice!

2. Hire a doula! I have already mentioned before about hiring a doula, but I can not stress enough how invaluable it is to have a doula! I haven't even been through the birthing process with her yet, but she has already well exceeded my expectations! She has just such a wealth of information available to give me anytime I have questions and is there anytime I have one either by email or phone. Having a doula can help to reduce the mother's request for an epidural or pain medication as well as reduces the need for pitocin or cesareans. (Read up about doulas on the website: http://www.dona.org/) My doula, Katie, has become a friend to me and I know that she will be even more invaluable to me once it comes time for the birthing process! I am SO thankful I found her!

3. Take birthing classes. Steve and I are currently taking Bradley classes and just started this week. It was pretty funny that we were the only couple that had children already, since most couples who take birthing classes are first time parents! I just feel so strongly that I need to be armed with as much information as possible in order to achieve a natural birth. The Bradley classes teach different exercises and relaxation techniques to help manage the pain of childbirth. I will be the first to admit that I am SCARED of the pain that I will experience during labor and delivery. But I feel that the Bradley techniques as well of the help of my doula (and husband!!) will get me through that pain. There are other birthing classes out there of course. Many doulas will offer shorter classes to give you an overview of some techniques to use. The standard Bradley class is 12 weeks long (ours is condensed into 8 weeks) and many people just don't have the time to put into that many weeks of classes. There are other options out there!

4. Brewer's diet. One of the things that Katie and my Bradley instructor have introduced me to is something called the Brewer's diet. It is a high protein diet for pregnant women which is supposed to significantly reduce the risk of pre-eclampsia, which is one of the biggest reasons for needing a c-section. You can learn more about the diet here: http://www.drbrewerpregnancydiet.com/index.html

5. Go see a Chiropractor who is Webster certified. I am still learning about this and am sold on the need for it, but am figuring out now if it is in the budget! I'm not sure if my insurance will cover it, so it may all depend on that. If anything, I hope to be able to go a couple of times (hopefully more) during my last trimester. There is something called the Webster technique (which you can read about here: http://www.icpa4kids.com/about/webster_technique.htm) that is done during pregnancy. I am not an expert on this by any means, but from what I understand, this helps facilitate optimal fetal positioning for birth. If you have a breech baby especially, this would be very helpful! According to Katie, it also helps to have a much easier delivery. A baby that is malpositioned can cause a much longer and harder delivery and often lead to a c-section. I have also heard from many other Moms that they swear by this as well and highly recommended doing it.

6. Have a birth plan! I think this is absolutely crucial. Even with such a supportive Doctor like mine, there is still the possibility that he will be out of town or unavailable when it comes time to deliver. Most Doctors would not even touch a woman who has had 3 c-sections and would automatically send me to a repeat c-section. Fortunately, my Doctor has several back up Doctors that are willing to go by the birth plan as long as Dr. C has signed off on it. You may have some battles to face, even with the birth plan, such as the hospital staff or an unwilling on-call Doctor. But it is so important to have your desires written down so that there is no question of what you expect to happen that day! If you have a doula, she can help you write a birth plan and let you know of some of the things you should put on it.

Those are just 6 things that I think are pretty important.. I know I have left off many. Unfortunately, as a VBAC hopeful, you have to go the extra mile, but hopefully, worth it in the end. I started with a dream with fears... I hope the end of that dream will be a happy ending with my beautiful baby girl delivered the way I desire it to happen! I do understand that there aren't always happy endings, but it won't be because I didn't try my hardest!

It's a....

GIRL!!! I went in for my 19 week appointment this week for my big gender ultrasound. Steve and I loaded up all three kiddos and made a family event out of it. The kids have been back and forth lately with boy vs. girl. I had a feeling it was a girl, but most of my family was convinced it was a boy. I think the Mom is usually right... after all, I am carrying this little one inside of me! When I first got a peek at the baby, I got all emotional, as this was the very first time I had even seen her on the screen. I never got an early ultrasound like I normally do. At first, I thought I saw a boy part... but then the ultrasound technician said, "It looks like you are having a girl!" Steve got all teary eyed, and the kids cheered! It was a beautiful moment! We couldn't be more excited to welcome our little girl into the family. God sure knew that we would need symmetry by evening out the genders in our family. Steve, being the math minded man that he is, couldn't be more thrilled! We are now finalizing our "S" name to keep in tradition with girls being "S" names and boys being "C" names. We are pretty certain we know the first name but are still agreeing on a middle name. Stay tuned....

Dr. C. then met with us briefly and said that everything looked good, except that my placenta was laying a little bit low. He wasn't concerned at this point, since he felt it was far enough away from the cervix that it should move up as I grow bigger. This happened to me in a previous pregnancy, and everything turned out fine. When I mentioned that our little girl was evening out the genders in our family, he said, "Well I don't think that makes your family complete." He said he thinks we should keep on going... I told him if I get this VBAC, we might just do that! He said "Well we will do everything we can to make that happen!" I LOVE this Doctor!

Right now I am deciding whether or not I should wean Caleb from breastfeeding. He just turned one and I am now at the half way point of my pregnancy. Typically at this point, my milk would be drying up, but it's not. He is perfectly content to continue and so am I. Really, I would miss it! So far I am continuing but will just wait and see if it affects my milk and if he decides he wants to wean. I have no interest in tandem feeding at this point (feeding both him and the baby at the same time) so I may just try to wean him by December.

All in all, everything is going well. I am happy with my weight gain and am feeling regular movement. I will post new belly pics soon!

Well hello there 2nd trimester!

Well I am officially in the 2nd trimester, and actually already a week into it, as I am 15 weeks today! Hard to believe... it's flown by so fast! In the past 4 weeks I have seen Dr. C twice to confirm that everything was A-ok with my uterus. Fortunately there were no ER trips for me this time around... although a couple of times I was a little bit nervous in the middle of the night that it might be happening. Fortunately I was armed with my exercises to push the uterus back out, and it seemed to help. As of today, the uterus has completely lifted up and there is no more worry there... we have heard the baby's heartbeat several times now... all three times it has ranged from 150's to 160's. Today it was 168. Dr. C. asked me if I had a feeling if it was a boy or girl. I told him sort of have a feeling it's a girl... but hey, I guess I have a 50% chance I'm right, huh? He laughed and said yes! But we will officially find out that news in 4 weeks! I am so excited to find out! The kids keep going back and forth between saying it's a girl and boy. I guess we will find out soon enough!

Pretty soon we will be shopping for the much needed mini-van to make our growing family official...

In VBAC news, I have joined the ICAN of North Texas group... ICAN is the International Cesarean Awareness Network, which naturally, raises awareness about cesareans, and promotes VBACs. It's a wonderful group of women who encourage each other during the process of attempting a VBAC, or post-cesarean. I have also officially hired a Doula and am very excited to be working with her. And last but not least, I signed up for my Bradley classes, which start on October 3rd. After sending in the deposits for both my Doula and Bradley classes, I had this moment of panic... realizing, this is really happening! I am really attempting a VBAC after 3 cesareans and *gasp* attempting a NATURAL birth! I know I can do this, but it was the moment of truth for me. I am pushing forward, full steam ahead.